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The Yellow Rake Will Save Your Life. The Yellow Rake Will Kill You.

Bad With Introductions

Bad With Introductions

“Not everything happens for a reason,” I say, responding to his claim to the contrary. “Life just happens. It’s all random — a sequence of moments with no meaning.”

He looks at me aghast, as if I had just told him happiness is an illusion (another tenet of life I happen to believe, but choose not to delve into here).

It’s apparent that no one has ever uttered such words in his presence. And I would like to think I blew his simple mind, but I probably just confused him. This is the first day of writing class and we paired off in order to introduce ourselves. We were supposed to say our names and one thing we believe. He said his name, Tyler, and that he believes everything happens for a reason. That's when I didn't say my name, but that other thing.

Sometimes it only takes a few seconds and a few sentences to make people really not like you.


Roommate Has Been On A Real Asshole Kick Lately

Roommate Has Been On A Real Asshole Kick Lately

Life's A Party: Could You Smell The Pants?

Life's A Party: Could You Smell The Pants?